DURBANVILLE BAPTIST CHURCH

SUICIDE

Now more than ever, we need to equip ourselves! Click here now for access to our newly launched teen suicide prevention programme, ‘Alive to Thrive’.

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Focus on the Family – Helping Families Thrive

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I have a love-hate relationship with money. I love the good things money can accomplish. I love how it can be used to provide for my needs and the needs of my wife and children. I love how it can be used to support God’s work in the world. I love being the contributor and the recipient of financial generosity—there is much joy in cheerful giving and grateful receiving. Yet I hate the way money can hold me captive, the way it subtly promises what only God can deliver. I hate how quickly it leaves my hands in an endless torrent of bills, payments, and expenses. Money is a joy and money is a burden.

In this series for Christian men, we are examining life through the biblical metaphor of a race. Writing to the Corinthians, Paul asks, “Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize?” He then provides an obvious application, a charge: “So run that you may obtain it.” We have been learning that victoriously running the race of life involves a wide array of skills and character traits. To our growing list we now add this: If you are going to run to win, you need to master your finances.

What You Own
All that you enjoy between birth and death is a gift. It belongs to God but is assigned to your care.

The bank account may be in your name, but it’s not actually your money. The deed to your home may have your first and last name printed at the top, but your house doesn’t truly belong to you. You came into this world naked and empty-handed, and you’ll leave this world naked and empty-handed. All that you enjoy between birth and death is a gift. It belongs to God but is assigned to your care.

This is known as stewardship. God is the creator of all that is and, therefore, God is the owner of all that is. “The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof, the world and those who dwell therein” (Psalm 24:1). He owns your home, your car, your money, and everything else. You relate to these things as a steward, as one who has been given the responsibility to use them on behalf of the owner. A steward is a manager, a person responsible for skillful management of resources.

Jesus illustrated the stewardship principle in one of his best-known parables, the one we know today as “The Parable of the Talents.” He tells the story of a master who is going on a journey, and before he departs, he distributes his wealth to his servants for safekeeping. To one he gives five talents, to another two, and to another one. Then he goes away, and the servants set to work. Two of the servants use the money wisely and double it; one of them buries it in the ground. When the master returns he demands an accounting. The two who have shown wisdom are rewarded, while the one who had been frugal and unwise is rebuked. Jesus provides this application: “For to everyone who has will more be given, and he will have an abundance. But from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away” (Matthew 25:29).

Rights and Responsibilities
God owns all things and distributes things to you so you can use them well and wisely. All money is God’s money, and while he has rights over it, you have responsibilities. He answers to no one, but you answer to him. You bear the responsibility not to squander your money, not to use it in ways that fail to carry out his purposes or even contradict his purposes. Conversely, you are responsible before God to use your money in ways that are pleasing to him, in ways that carry out his will on earth. God gives every dollar in trust and has the right to demand an accounting for it.

This is a weighty and sacred responsibility. You might think, then, that the only noble purposes for money are giving it to churches and charities and Christian ministries. But it is not so simple. God is a loving Father who “richly provides us with everything to enjoy” (1 Timothy 6:17). He does not equate stewardship with austerity. Rather, he instructs you to find an appropriate balance between what you keep and what you give, between what you use for purposes of comfort and what you use for purposes of kingdom advancement.

God addresses your heart’s relationship with money both negatively and positively. Negatively, he warns you that “the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil” (1 Timothy 6:10) and insists that money offers more than it can deliver: “He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity” (Ecclesiastes 5:10). You must be very careful with money, knowing that it has the power to hold you captive.

God promises joy to those who hold their money loosely and give with generosity.

Positively, God promises joy to those who hold their money loosely and give with generosity. Solomon observes, “One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want. Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered” (Proverbs 11:24-25). There is also joy to be had beyond this life, for even though you cannot take your wealth with you, you can, in a sense, send it on ahead (as Randy Alcorn is so fond of saying). “Sell your possessions, and give to the needy. Provide yourselves with moneybags that do not grow old, with a treasure in the heavens that does not fail, where no thief approaches and no moth destroys” (Luke 12:33). Those with wealth are “to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, thus storing up treasure for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life” (1 Timothy 6:18-19).

God has given you money so you can put it to work in his world and for his purposes. This will involve the day-to-day financial management of paying bills, buying groceries, and making payments into a retirement account. It will also involve giving generously to the church and to believers who have needs. It will involve a constant awareness that money is a wonderful servant but a terrible master, that it all belongs to God, and that it is to be used to bring glory to him.

Do It Now!
If you are going to master your finances, you need to take action. Here are some places to begin.

Read a good book on money. For some reason, few of us are taught financial management in school, in church, or even in our parents’ homes. Thankfully, we are well-served with excellent books that explain God’s view on money. Perhaps begin with Managing God’s Money by Randy Alcorn, a personal favorite and an excellent primer on the subject.
Budget your money. Few things make a bigger difference to your diligent stewardship of money than maintaining a budget. There are hundreds of different ways to maintain a budget, but the important principle is this: Account for every penny. A good budget will force you to understand how you spend your money and call you to account for where you are spending poorly. When it comes to budgeting, that you do it is far more important than how you do it.
Enjoy your money. While God calls you to be a faithful steward of your money, God is pleased when you enjoy it. As Solomon says, “Everyone also to whom God has given wealth and possessions and power to enjoy them, and to accept his lot and rejoice in his toil—this is the gift of God” (Ecclesiastes 5:19). You can buy items that make you comfortable and travel to places that are restful. Sometimes the wisest way to spend money is to spend it on something that brings you joy and blessing.
Ask questions. Consider the four questions John Wesley asked of any expenditure: In spending this money, am I acting as if I own it, or am I acting as the Lord’s trustee? What Scripture passage requires me to spend this money in this way? Can I offer up this purchase as a sacrifice to the Lord? Will God reward me for this expenditure at the resurrection of the just?
Plan your giving. Many people form a plan to increase their retirement savings or to increase the amount they are saving for a new car. Few people plan to increase their giving to God’s work. Consider how you will give more next year than you did this year. Why not plan to add a small percentage each year? If you give $200 a month this year, plan how you can make it $220 a month next year. If you give $1500 a month this year, make every effort to up it to $1600 next year. Don’t allow your income and expenses to grow without also growing your giving.

Intimacy with God is available to you. It is as accessible to you as God’s promises. And God’s invitation to you to enjoy intimate fellowship with him is that thing that is putting your faith to the test more than anything else (James 1:2–4).

The Heart of Intimacy

Intimacy is what we call the experience of really knowing and being known by another person. We frequently use spatial language when describing this experience. An intimate friend is someone we feel very close to; they know us at a deep level. If something happens that damages the intimacy with our friend, they feel distant from us. Or a person who doesn’t know us intimately knows us at a superficial level.

But of course intimacy is not spatial but relational. We all know what it’s like to be sitting right next to a person with whom we feel distant and we can feel close to a person who is four thousand miles away.

“Biblical knowledge is far better than gold when it fuels our trust in God. Otherwise, it only fuels our pride.”

 

What makes us feel intimate with another person? While there are many ingredients to intimacy and each intimate relationship we have has a different recipe, common to all of them is trust. We cannot be intimate with a person we don’t trust.

The Heart of Intimacy with God

This is as true in our relationship with God as it is in our relationships with other human beings. Our experience of God’s nearness or distance is not a description of his actual proximity to us, but of our experience of intimacy with him. Scripture shows us that God is intimate with those who trust him. The more we trust God, the more intimately we come to know him. A felt distance from God is often due to a disruption in trust, such as a sin or disappointment.

Intimacy Is More Than Knowledge

One common mistake is thinking that nearness to God can be achieved through knowledge accumulation. Now, of course, to intimately know God, we must know crucial things about God. Jesus said, “you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:32) and he pointed out that many worship what they do not know (John 4:22).

But never in the history of the Christian church has so much theological knowledge been available to so many people as it is today. The American church enjoys perhaps the greatest amount of this abundance. We are awash in Bible translations, good books, insightful articles, recorded sermons, interviews, movies, documentaries, music, and more. And much of it very good. It is right for us to be very thankful.

But America is not abounding in Enochs (or finding them frequently disappearing), saints who walk with God in a profoundly intimate way (Genesis 5:24; Hebrews 11:5). Why? Because knowledge is not synonymous with trust. That’s why Jesus said to the religious leaders of his day, some who possessed an encyclopedic knowledge of Scripture,

“You search the Scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; and it is they that bear witness about me, yet you refuse to come to me that you may have life.” (John 5:39–40)

Biblical knowledge is far better than gold when it fuels our trust in God, because it fuels our intimacy with God (Psalm 19:10). But when biblical knowledge replaces our trust in God, it only fuels our pride (1 Corinthians 8:1).

Why Aesthetic Experiences Fail

Another common mistake is trying to achieve intimacy with God through subjective aesthetic experiences. We might call it a “Field of Dreams” approach: If we build the right environment, God will “come.”

Some pursue this in high liturgical environments designed to inspire an experience of transcendence and mystery. Others pursue it in contemporary worship events designed to inspire an experience of immanence. Others chase revivals, thinking that proximity to God’s power will result in proximity to God. If we truly trust God, such environments can encourage our intimacy with God. But none of them inherently possesses the power to conjure God’s nearness to us.

“God is impressed with our faith, not our feats.”

Think of it like this: A candlelit dinner with romantic music may encourage a sweet moment of relational intimacy between a husband and wife, but only to the degree that the environment encourages and deepens their mutual trust and love. If there’s relational distance between them due to a lack of trust, the aesthetics themselves have no power to bridge the distance. Only restoring the trust will do that.

How We Draw Near to God

The secret to drawing near to God and having him draw near to us is revealed clearly in the Bible: we draw near to God through faith in Christ who alone gives us access to him (Hebrews 4:14–16; 7:25; Philippians 3:9), and we put our trust in all of “his precious and very great promises” which find their Yes to us in Christ (2 Peter 1:4; 2 Corinthians 1:20).

God is impressed with our faith, not our feats. Where faith is lacking, he is not pleased with the quantity of our knowledge or the quality of our aesthetic events.

And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him. (Hebrews 11:6)

When God sees someone whose heart fully trusts his promises and lives by them, God comes to strongly support that saint (2 Chronicles 16:9) and manifests himself to him:

“Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.” (John 14:21)

God’s Invitation to Intimacy

“What you must trust God most for right now is where he means for you to draw closer to him.”

 

God wants intimacy with you. Christ has done all the hard work in the cross to make it possible. All he requires is that you believe in him (John 14:1). He wants you to trust him with all your heart (Proverbs 3:5).

Which means his invitation to you to enjoy intimacy with him is the providences in your life that are testing your faith more than anything else. What you must trust God most for right now is where he means for you to draw closer to him.

It is likely an invitation that your flesh wants to decline. But as you read your Bible, do not the great cloud of witnesses (Hebrews 12:1) all agree with James and Peter that the greatest testing of faith is the path to the greatest joy (James 1:2–4; 1 Peter 1:8–9)? And do they not agree with Paul that it is not worth comparing to the joy of knowing Christ and the coming glory (Philippians 3:8; Romans 8:18)?

To be sure, God ordains to do many good things through hours or months or years of labor. Prayer is not meant to replace toil. For example, God wills that a chapter be read, or a meal prepared, or a friend visited in the space of hours not seconds. He wills that a house be built in months not hours. He wills that a child be reared in years not months.

But there are breakthroughs which could come in seconds. They often take us hours or days or months — if they come at all. I have in mind especially the breakthroughs of insight that open a world of life-changing truth and practical wisdom.

Many obstacles to joy and fruitfulness are owing to the fact that we cannot see reality the way it is. We cannot see the meaning of a biblical teaching. Or the meaning of a tragic event. Or the meaning of a friend’s rebuke. We are blind to it. The breakthrough doesn’t come. We may study and think for days or weeks or months, and not see reality any differently than when we started.

I have tasted this frustration dozens of times in trying to understand the Scriptures. I may be preparing a sermon, or pondering a devotional text in relation to some besetting sin, or thinking about a promise of God in connection with a lingering disappointment. I look and look and study and think. And I don’t see it. The breakthrough doesn’t come. Or it may come after days or weeks of seeking. Or not.

But other times — many times — in my desperation I have gone to my knees and called out for insight. I have pleaded, Open my eyes, that I may see wondrous things in your word (Psalms 119:18). Touch me with your salve that I may see (Revelation 3:18). Enlighten the eyes of my heart (Ephesians 1:18). And in the twinkling of an eye, the veil has been lifted. I see something that I had never seen before, though it lay right before me. The pieces come together.

Consider two analogies that shed light on what is happening here.

The first is optical illusions. Look at this one.

Perhaps, you are looking at a picture of a young woman facing away from you. You may look for hours and not see that her jaw is the nose of an old woman, and her ear is the old woman’s eye, and her neck-band is the old woman’s mouth. Then, in the twinkling of an eye you see the old woman.

That’s an analogy of many issues in life and many perplexities in the Bible. We look and we look. We think. We study. We may even discuss and debate. And all we see is a young woman looking away from us.

Then, one day, we realize we have not intentionally stopped, admitted our blindness, and called on God for the gift of sight. So we stop and get down on our knees — to say with our body how weak and helpless we are — and ask him for a breakthrough.

Sometimes it comes while praying. Sometimes a hour later, as we work on. Sometimes he says, Not now, and gives us peace to live in our limits. “Now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face” (1 Corinthians 13:12).

Or consider the story of being trapped in a dungeon cell. You have heard there is a tunnel to freedom on the other side of the wall. But the wall is stone, and you have no tools. For months you use fragments of stone to chip away at the wall, and you work and work to gain your freedom.

Then one night, when your hope is almost gone, you collapse in weariness against the wall, and your elbow hits a slight protrusion. Before your eyes the stones move and a small door opens by itself. You are free.

Life has many dungeon cells, and stone walls, to hinder our joy and fruitfulness. Some of them are meant to fall down in five years. Others in five seconds. Whether it is the patient endurance to press on with joy, or the breakthrough in the twinkling of an eye, God has appointed prayer as the key.

If the wall is meant to give way in five years, prayer is the key: “May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy” (Colossians 1:11).

If the wall is meant to open by the press of unknown button, prayer is the key: “Knock, and it will be opened to you” (Matthew 7:7).

The Power of a Mother’s Love

Mother love shapes cultures and individuals. While most mothers know that their love and emotional availability are vital to their children’s well-being, many of us do not understand the profound and long-lasting impact we have in developing our young children’s brains, teaching them first lessons of love, shaping their consciences … At a time when society urges women to seek their worth and personal fulfillment in things that take them away from their families and intimate bonds, Hunter invites women to come home — to their children, their best selves, their hearts.

You and I need to be willing to look inside our own experiences to identify any places we may still be affected by our relationship with our own mother. We can begin that journey by simply being willing to search our heart and better understand ourselves. Professional counseling may also be a valuable part of that process. Laura Ingalls Wilder said, “What is there in the attitude of your children toward yourself that you wish were different? Search your own heart and learn if your ways toward your own mother could be improved.” This is important whether your mother is still living or not. You and I are deeply affected by our relationship with our mother and one of the most powerful gifts we can give to our children is our own emotional health. A first step you can take on this journey is reading The Mom I Want to Be by T. Suzanne Eller. This book is designed to help you rise above your past and give your kids a great future.

A child should never feel as if they need to earn a mother’s love. This will leave a void in their heart all of their life. A mother’s love needs to be given unconditionally to establish trust and a firm foundation of emotional intimacy in a child’s life. If love is withheld, a child will look for it in a million other ways, sometimes throughout their lifetime unless they come to some sort of peace with their past. The emotional foundation we give our children at home is foundational to their life. We cannot underestimate the value of home and the power of mother love.

Run the Race of Faith

Hebrews 12:1-3

12 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him, he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

I love running. It is one of those activities which I really enjoy. I don’t run as often as I should, but it is such an incredible experience to be running outside in nature and even partaking in races.

Sometimes the races are tough and certain things can make running theses races difficult. Such as injury/lack of fitness, which can make the whole experience unpleasant.

Yet there are elements which make running these races enjoyable, such as never being alone. There are fellow runners that run alongside you and you have people on the sidelines cheering you on. Sometimes they don’t know you and yet they cheer you on, which motivates you to push on to reach the finish line. Further, each runner does not run aimlessly, but rather everyone is focused on running well for themselves to finish the race, either for a good finishing time or personal victory of finishing the race within the cut off point.

Now, the Christian life is also referred to as a race. This race is not against other people, rather it is you alone, running your own race. This race is not a sprint, rather it is a marathon with various stages to it. Each of us are at different stages of our races. Some are in the final stretch which can be a sprint, while others have just begun their race.

In this well-known passage of Hebrews, the writer starts with expressing how being surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses (v.1), the believers who have gone before us, those who have run the race before us, who are now cheering us on, as we run our races. This is motivation to us to press on.

The writer goes on to speak about throwing off sin (v.1). As a runner, you don’t want any baggage or excess items to prevent you from running your race well. Sin can prevent us from running our races well and can keep us away from reaching our goal of finishing the race. It can disqualify us from the race, which we need to be aware of. The writer goes on to encourage us, to run the race with perseverance (v.1). Perseverance, referring to the idea of never giving up and to fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith (v.2), who has faced the cross for us, who is seated at the right hand of God the Father(vv.2-3). This should encourage us all to not lose heart as we  run our races, whether it be at the start, the half way mark or at the end of it.  

So, in conclusion, Do not give up, as you run your race. Remember the crowd of witnesses who have gone before you, who are cheering you on. Remember to throw off sin and to fix your eyes on Jesus. Keep him at the focus of your race as you aim to finish well. Remember, Jesus is cheering you on and wants you to finish your race well. Let us aspire to run the race well as we seek to glorify Christ in all that we do.

Matthew Christy

Are All Sins Equal Before God?

I’ve often heard it said that all sins are equal before God. But this just doesn’t seem right. What would you say?

I have heard that too. And the reason people have said that is because of James 2:10 where it says, “If you have committed one sin you are guilty of all.” Which seems to mean that, whether small sin or big sin, I’m totally guilty of all the commandments. Therefore every sin is equally damning to me.

That’s not the whole story, is it?

First, not everybody is hurt in the same way by every sin. In other words, if I shoot Michael dead right now, or if I just spit on him, both are very ugly sins and Jesus calls hatred murder. But he’s not dead if I only spit on him!

So worse sin—meaning worse in its effect—would be killing over spitting. And I think we should say that. It is! Because consequences matter—at least for you!—and for me, I think, because here is another text we have to bring in.

Jesus taught that there would be degrees of punishment. If you know the right and don’t do it, you’ll be beaten with more stripes than if you don’t know the right and do wrong.

So there’s degrees of punishment, which must mean degrees of guiltiness, which must mean that some sins are more blameworthy than others.

Let me go back to James and just say what I think is meant there. The argument is, The reason why you are guilty of all if you do one sin is because one God said all.

Therefore, what he is drawing attention to is, if I say to God, “I’m going to do this against you”—this small sin, say, spitting on somebody—”and I’m going to do this big sin against you,” in both cases you’ve defied God. In both cases you’ve said no to God. That’s what he’s saying. He wants us to feel that every sin, from the smallest to the greatest, is against God and not just against people and their consequences.

And in that sense every sin is infinitely heinous.

Living Righteously

¹⁵ Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise,¹⁶ making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.¹⁷ Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.

Ephesians 5:15-17 New International Version (NIV)

James 4:14 says that our lives are like the mist, here one moment and gone the next. The time we have here on earth is valuable. Not only is it valuable because it is short in the grander scheme of things, but because, as followers of Jesus Christ, we are called to live lives of righteousness so that we may reflect God to the rest of the world.

In Ephesians 4 and 5 Paul gives instructions on Christian living. Now he doesn’t mention what they can or cannot watch on Netflix, but he does give instructions on multiple aspects of our lives such as our words, relationships, emotions and sex. In all aspects Paul draws a contrast between the way of the world and the way of righteousness. God has called us to be set apart from the world in every way. Ephesians 5:15-17 reminds us to take check of the way that we live. Those hurtful words said in anger leave an impact on the receiver. That derogatory joke leaves an impression on your audience. The unforgiveness you are holding on to is in contradiction to what you profess to believe. The way we conduct ourselves as believers does not just have an impact on our own relationship with the Lord, but it impacts those around us.

The world is watching. The world watches the way we live; what we say, how we act, what we watch and read. Are we weighing our words? Do we practise the forgiveness we preach? Are we removing and running from temptations and stumbling blocks? Are the things that fill our lives reflections of Jesus or our own earthly desires?

As followers we are called to live lives worthy of the salvation we have already received. Let’s pursue righteousness in every aspect of our lives; be it at home, work, varsity, school and church, in the big things and the seemingly small things.

Father God point out the things in my life that are not glorifying you. Show me what I need to remove from my life and fill it instead with your goodness. Help me desire more of you in every aspect of my life. Help me use every opportunity you give me to the fullest. Let my life glorify and honour you. Amen.

Gabi Mostert

Unconditional Respect 

As Christians, we accept that we are in the world but not OF it; therefore, we choose to apply values in our lives that reflect Christ’s nature.

One value which is typically highlighted by society but often goes misinterpreted is respect.

Most individuals view respect as a reward one can earn. This is contrary to the will of God. Respect, similarly to grace, is something we as believers should choose to exact on others regardless of their treatment of us. We are called to love without first deciphering whether another is worthy thereof. We are called to display love unconditionally as Jesus did.

One phrase commonly quoted is “He/She has lost my respect”. However, God calls us to be merciful, see beyond the wrongdoing and to not depend on respect being expressed mutually. 

No Christ Without the Cross

But there is no “Christ” without the cross. Don’t take my word for it. Take it from Jesus Himself:

Amidst the wealth of confusion about the identity of Jesus, you nailed it. So right are you, in fact, that your answer could not have come exclusively by your own intuition or intellect—it was a gift from God Himself. But Peter did not understand the implications of calling Jesus the Messiah, or the Christ:

If you take the cross away from Jesus, you strip Him of His mission. You devalue His life. You nullify His authority. And you stand against His crowning triumph and glory.

Jesus withstood the taunts of the soldiers. He was silent before the mocking crowd and the preening government officials. But He will not remain silent when someone tries to separate Him from the very reason He came to earth in the first place. There is no such thing as a cross-less Christ.

Reading: Matthew 16